A Beautiful Contradiction
Image credit: Microsoft Clip Art
Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.
You see, I’ve received the Beautiful Blogger Award by the witty, charming, and beautiful I Mayfly. This may or may not be her real name, but if it is, she has my sympathy. On the other hand, her parents have my stink eye.
The rules are simple. All I need to do is express my gratitude to my lovely insect friend (thank you, I Mayfly!) and pass the honor to other bloggers. For those of you who enjoy rules and order, I have included the award regulations at the end of this post.
Absent from these rules is any requirement I divulge personal information about myself, a gift for which we are all grateful. But I have to give you something, no? And since it won’t be my chocolate, I’ll need an alternative. And yes, I like to start sentences with conjunctions. And no, I don’t care if The Elements of Style tells me I shouldn’t. But yes, I do care what you think. So yes, I’ll stop if you want me to.
So what to do? What to do? What ties into the theme of beautiful blogger?
This could be me, but there's no chocolate smeared around her mouth, so it must not be. (Image credit: Microsoft Clip Art)
Got it!
The sexy/ugly game, of course!
Years ago, my sister and I enjoyed a sincere but cruel game of sexy/ugly. This involves naming a celebrity who’s ugly but at the same time sexy. A Google canoodle the other day assured me I wasn’t the only one to play this game, but my search was cursory. As a science gal, I never want to introduce bias.
I’ll admit, I hesitated about this post, because I don’t enjoy poking fun at others unless they deserve it. But then I realized the soon to be mentioned celebrities have armpit hair more important than me, and any hurt feelings generated by my adolescent musings would be more than compensated by their mansions, pool floaties, and well-dressed pooches.
So here goes. My list of sexy/ugly is:
David Bowie—Not only sexy and ugly but hip as well. A triple threat.
Angelica Huston—A face like a drag queen but sexy as hell.
Billy Bob Thornton—Introspective and he sports vials of blood.
Sandra Bernhard—An apt surname given that prominent proboscis and gap-toothed grin can both burn and make… (Oh, now I really apologize for that last one.)
Tommy Lee Jones—A younger Tommy Lee Jones, not the current Shar-pei version.
Image credit: dogbreedworld.net
Mick Jagger—Maroon 5 didn’t make a song about those gyrating hips for nothing.
Steven Tyler—Best. Accessorizer. Ever. Just stay away from that mouth. It’s big enough to eat you.
Sam Shepard—Rugged and manly. But don’t Google his 2009 mug shot unless you’re hankering for a shudder.
Joan Cusack—Hmmm, I guess I’ll let you be the judge on this one. Might be too mom-ish for some.
The Hangover Monkey—Come on, you know it’s true.
Image credit: mediagallery.usatoday.com
So there you have it. Evidence once again of an education gone wrong. The astute among you will notice the list contains more men than women (and believe me, I had to scrounge for those women) and too many lily-white visages. Might this be because ugly white men can make it in Hollywood easier than their less comely female and ethnic colleagues? I’ll skip the social commentary, but just saying…
So who are your sexy/uglies? If you are too dignified to answer, then I am interested in your opinion on solving the U.S. health care crisis, a discussion on the fragility of the current global economy, or the solution to unsustainable oil production. What’s that? You’ll stick with the sexy/ugly? Thought so.
* * *
The rules for the Beautiful Blogger Award are:
1. Thank the person who gave you the award
2. Paste the award on your blog
3. Link the person who nominated you for the award
4. Nominate your choice of bloggers
5. Post links to the blogs you nominated
As you can see, there is no specified number of victims to pass the award on to. Therefore, I gift it to everyone. Feel free to accept it and paste it onto your own blog or not. A cop out, you say? Perhaps. But such inclusiveness is my appreciation to everyone who has clicked my follow button. Because to me, that really is beautiful…
Related articles
- The Liebster Who Inspiringly Straddled The Sunshine (carrierubin.com)
- The Versatile Blogger Award. Pour Moi? (carrierubin.com)
- Scaring Your Doctor From A To Z (carrierubin.com)
- Why I Will Never Have A Bestseller (carrierubin.com)
120 Responses to “A Beautiful Contradiction”
[...] A Beautiful Contradiction (carrierubin.com) [...]
[...] of Carrie—oh wait, no, no—not THAT one! No, I mean Carrie at The Write Transition! Anyway, she twisted my arm to accept the Beautiful Blogger Award. So I broke down and did so. [...]
You are a treat!
I don’t know about that, but I do know I eat my share of them…
Thanks, for stopping by Polly!
Sexy-ugly is a good term to start using more….
It does kind of roll off the tongue, doesn’t it?…
What an amazing humorist you are. That wit is wicked. Just don’t turn it loose on me, unless you are needing hamburger for tonight’s menu. . . .xoxo
Oh, I’m always kind to anyone sweet enough to read my blog and put up with my arrested development. Promise. Now go accept your Beautiful Blogger Award. You most certainly deserve it.
And thank you for the warm fuzzy!
Sweetheart, I am dense as a door — what did I miss? Beautiful Blogger Award??? Am I sleep walking through the world again?
Sexy/Ugly game? Is it like, when you see a dog that’s so ugly he’s cute? It usually only happens to me with dogs… and Nutrias (they are cute from far away!) but not with people really…
I do agree with ONE of your celebrities, Tommy Lee Jones! <– you're too funny!
Also along the lines of “a face only a mother could love.” Not very nice of me, for sure, but kind of fun to play.
Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and for the follow. I appreciate it!
What a fun game, I especially agree with David Bowie. I am going to start using sexy-ugly as a word.
Always good to increase one’s vocabulary.
If you’re still looking for female non-Caucasians, I can’t decide if Sandra Oh is god-awful ugly or ridiculously beautiful. It’s definitely not anything in between, though. And your comparison of Tommy Lee Jones to a shar-pei was the funniest thing I’ve read today!
Oh, she’s a perfect choice! Thank you! The first person to come up with a non-Caucasian female who fits the list. Now I can sleep better tonight. Which really does tell you a thing or two about my mind set…
Thanks so much for stopping by and for the follow. Now go collect your beautiful award.
I showed up here today because I was told the word “penis” would be used in a post. I can’t help but feel deceived.
So sorry to confuse an already addled mind. My bad. I should have said it was coming out Thursday. In fact, I’m working on it now…
Sandra Bernhard? Only on 1 list and it is not the sexy list.
So she doesn’t float your boat, huh? That’s okay. I suspect you don’t float hers either if you know what I mean.
Sam Elliott! He makes me melty inside. Also I had an Alan Alda dream in the 80′s that has made me look at him in a completely different light ever since, but I don’t expect anyone else to get that. I think Dame Judy Dench is beautiful, but my husband thinks I’m nuts. In fact, our version of your game is when he asks me, “So what about that actor? Do you think he/she is good looking? (implying impossibility)” I have a low threshold for beauty, I guess.
Not surprisingly, I haven’t been nominated for an award since I threw a word-bomb at them on my blog some months ago. I don’t hate them, but I might be too lazy for them. So I will secretly accept your award and not do anything about it but feel good that you gave it to me (I also have a low threshold for gratitude.) Peace!
I’m glad to see others stoop to my level and play similar adolescent games. And I agree with your choices, although I’m with you, Dame Judy Dench is too attractive to be considered “ugly”.
The whole blogger award thing leads to taking sides, doesn’t it? Some play the game; others don’t. To me, either way is cool. But to be sure, I take it with a grain of salt and a heavy dose of humor. They’re not exactly rare, after all.
Thanks for dropping by! Nice to see you back. I’m sure you are very busy with your new job, which I hope is going well for you.
I’m going to go with John Malkovich as my favorite sexy/ugly.
Love your blog!
Oh, yes, he deserves to be on there. Although, he’s a bit sinister as well…
Thanks so much for stopping by my blog. I appreciate it!
I like that those who click your follow button get the award, very clever. And, I was confused about the grammer part, but that’s just me. I will have to give this sexy/ugly game some thought I will get back to you on after giving it some thought. :+)
If I haven’t left someone confused, then I haven’t done my job…
Feel free to accept the Beautiful Blogger Award. It sounds like you could use a pick-me-up after the past couple weeks you’ve had.
Now that was a great way to respond to an award! Never saw that before. Perfect people on the list too.
Well, I do tend to stray a bit in my award acceptance posts. One must keep things fresh, yes? Plus, it’s my waying of showing I don’t take the whole blog award thing too seriously. But it’s fun to play the game.
Thanks for stopping by. Feel free to accept the award. Bloggers like you who make others laugh are certainly beautiful!
The awards are a funny thing. Some crave them, some get angry if they get them, some like you and I take them for what they are…love and appreciation from those who spend part of thier day with us!
Absolutely!
Congratulations on the award – well deserved. As for the ugly/sexy people…I thought I was the only one who played that game!
So glad to learn there are other educated people that sink to my level. Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and good luck on yours. It looks like a fresh one!
It’s new and yet not new. I am the artist formerly known as brainvomit40
Ahhh–are you switching sites? If so, I’ll be sure to click the follow button.
Yes…I’ve started a new blog at the valleygirl96 address. Thanks for reading!!!
Excellent. Consider me following.
Oops. I forgot to say congrats on the award!
Thanks! Feel free to accept it if you play the award game.
Here all this time I thought I was the only one that thinks Angelina is unattractive. She reminds me of Cruella DeVille from 101 Dalmatians.
If they ever do a remake of the film, she’s now got my vote for lead actress.
Thanks for stopping by and sinking to my level!
I have this very disturbing imagine in my head of you being swallowed by Steven Tyler with just your legs hanging out of his mouth. I told you it was disturbing. I support Emma’s nomination of Alan Rickman. I’d do him and I don’t know why.
I love the award to everyone theme.
That IS a disturbing image. Of course, dangling legs from lips could be a new fashion accessory for Steven. He’s already tried everything else…
And yes, I think Alan Rickman definitely deserves a spot on that list.
Thanks for stopping by!
[...] stole got this award from Carrie Rubin’s blog The Write Transition. I didn’t have to do anything for it. She didn’t personally give it to me either. [...]
“Therefore, I gift it to everyone. Feel free to accept it and paste it onto your own blog or not. A cop out, you say? Perhaps. But such inclusiveness is my appreciation to everyone who has clicked my follow button. Because to me, that really is beautiful…”
Ha, I love that. Very cool. I’m always amazed at how grateful I am for my little WordPress community.
It is a fabulous community, isn’t it? I’ve never had an unpleasant comment, and everyone is so supportive. I never imagined I would enjoy blogging so much. Thanks for stopping by and be sure to get your Beautiful Blogger Award.
Argh, some of your ugly/sexy people are really ugly! Steve Tyler & Mick Jagger? Barf. Sorry, I didn’t mean to throw up on your blog…
I only like looking at good looking people on the screen and I usually find ugly people, well, ugly.
But I’ll try to add to your list, although they may not quite fit:
- Steven Colbert. He’s so sexy with his eyeglasses and inappropriate remarks.
- John Lithgow. His sense of humor makes him irresistible.
- Steve Martin. He’s more average than ugly, but super sexy when he screws around.
- Christopher Walken. I can’t believe he didn’t make it on your list.
Oh, you make me laugh. I love it when people don’t mince words, and you sure didn’t in that first paragraph!
And see? You play the game well. I agree with all of your choices, well, except maybe for John Lithgow, ever since I saw him play a psycho serial killer on Dexter…Sexy? Not so much. Terrifying? Absolutely.
Thanks for stopping by to play!
I didn’t see that show but I can imagine Lithgow being terrifying. He’s a such wonderful actor! He wrote a children’s book called The Runaway Pancake (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0689878478/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=marketing020-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0689878478) and it comes with a CD of Lithgow narrating the story in front of a group of kids. It’s absolutely hilarious.
With a title like that, it would have to be. I’ll check it out. Thanks!
Congrats on the Beautiful Blogger Award! I really enjoyed your sexy/ugly list.
Hmm…I would say Adrian Brody. He’s so sexy. But kissing around that nose…problematic. 
Oh, man, why didn’t I think of him? Perfect choice.
And please take the Beautiful Blogger Award. You most definitely deserve it!
Aw thanks!
Much appreciated. 
Uma Thurman too. She’s definitely on the list. 
Just watched Smash tonight.
I like the Everyone idea – diplomatic and efficient. Why didn’t I think of that? Wig must have slowed the flow of blood to my head. Yeah, that’s it. -Nikki
Oh, maybe I should get one then. That way I’ll have an excuse for my absentmindedness.
Hope you were okay with the Mayfly teasing. It’s all in fun and admiration!
Anyone with a potty gravatar should be prepared for teasing, don’t ya think? I started to retort that my ‘real’ name was Mayfly Butterworth and that it was in memory of my dear great great granny, but that seemed lame.
Actually, if I told you my father and brother’s real names you would swear I was making it up…it’s THAT bad. How my parents could have done that to my brother is a mystery to me. Why my brother hasn’t change his name is a mystery to me. Well, maybe not. Once you hear the name, you never forget it. Guess that’s helpful in the sales game.
Now is that a good tease or is that a good tease?
A very good tease! And it sounds like your parents still deserve my stink eye.
The first time I enlarged your Gravatar I burst out laughing. I couldn’t tell it was a toilet until I enlarged it. It’s a good one!
My work throne as it has come to be known (__|__)
Well, I’m stuck on the sexy/ugly thing. Maybe I’m shallow, but if I don’t find someone attractive, I can’t imagine them as sexy! So I can’t understand, for example, why men think Nicole Kidman is sexy because she reminds me of the Bride of Frankenstein….. But that’s not your point, is it!
So I’ll bow out of that topic and instead focus on congratulating you for the award—well deserved! I’m doing my own belated acceptance post tomorrow, so I’ll just admire the pretty graphic on your blog page.
Oh come on, you didn’t want to tackle one of my other discussion topics? I understand–it’s been a long day.
That it has! But I suspect some of my characters would have plenty to say about them…. I need to rein in some of their personal rants in this round of edits.
I know what you mean. Sometimes when I write my characters’ dialogue, I get so into it, I go on and on, assuming others will be as fascinated by the ensuing conversation as I am. It’s only after I get some distance and then go back that I can see I let my characters go on a little too much.
Sexy/Ugly! I will have to give this some thought because no one is coming to mind immediately except for Hank Moody in Californication. I think David Duchovny might qualify here. I like your list
Hmmm, might he be too good looking to qualify for the ugly part? I don’t know–I haven’t seen him in anything for awhile. I’ll have to trust your instinct on that one, because as you know, this is highly scientific and earth-shattering material we’re dealing with…
I couldn’t decide! He is sexy, but his character is one that I’m embarrassed to admit I find attractive
I haven’t seen that show. Now you’ve got me curious. I may have to check it out. Literally. From the library. Because I’m too cheap to buy the DVDs…
Your sexy/ugly list is hilarious! I completely agree with you! David Bowie is so true – I am drawn to him but I don’t even know why! I would have to add Nicholas Cage to your list!
Oh, he’s a good one! I used to think he was handsome but now–eh, not so much. But still sexy. Very nice addition to my very adolescent behavior.
[...] You Beautiful Bwogger You! Apr30 Thanks To: http://carrierubin.com [...]
This was better than the “Who would you rather sleep with?” dinner party game!
So I’m not the only one who pursues such adolescent antics? Good to know!
Steven Tyler? Have you seen him recently? He looks like someones grandma. I was recently unfortunate enough to see brief footage of him in his swimming trunks on the beach. I almost hurled my dinner across the room at the wall – after I had already eaten it.
I think I would add PJ Harvey. Oh and I expect you’ve seen this: http://sexyuglypeople.wordpress.com/
Wow, a blog devoted entirely to sexy/uglies?! I had not seen that. And I’m glad I didn’t. It would have biased me for sure.
Your comment made me laugh out loud, because I realize I, too saw that beach photo of Steven to which you refer. Hurl-worthy without a doubt. I guess I’ll need to premise a younger Steven Tyler on my list.
Thanks for a good laugh. And I agree, PJ Harvey could make the list. But I had to Google her to be sure.
Love it! Thank you! That is awesome. Instead of just a few suckers, all of us are roped in! HAHA… For me it’s Hilary Swank and the episode of the The Office in deciding whether or not she is ugly/ beautiful. Heck, I still don’t know. Loved her in Million Dollar Baby.
Love this post!
Pink.
Oh, she’s a good one! I didn’t even think of Miss Hilary. And thank you for demeaning yourself to answer this question. I love bringing others down to my level. Now go get started on your own Beautiful Blogger Award post, because you definitely deserve it. And in a good way!
Awwww.. thank you soo much! How ironic, I’ve ALWAYS wanted one! Woooo hooo!! You just made my day! And hundreds of others too I can tell!
Wowee! So honored! Blush, gush, woo!
Pink.
I loved this post but not sure that I feel ok with just grabbing the award. You should have asked us to do something for it…back flips or something. I agree with you on Mick Jagger (he was my idol when I was a teen) but Steven Tyler is super hot and I would purposely get close to his mouth to get what you warned me about…
Okay, Wendy dear, I’m not going near that last sentence of yours. But I will say please, grab the award! It’s there for the taking. If you want to do some back flips, that would be fine. In fact, maybe you could do them with Steven…
hehehe..back flips, front flips, push-ups….I think you get the picture.
Congrats on the award! As far as ugly-pretty goes, my first thought was Jagger, although I see you’ve included him already. Maybe Bjork? Or is she just ugly-ugly?
Well, her clothes are definitely ugly-ugly. I’ll have to leave it up to the Y chromosomes to determine whether she’s sexy or not.
Thanks for stopping by and demeaning yourself to such a question. Oh, wait a minute, I’ve read your blog. This may actually be a step up for you…
Madam, you have upset my lily-like feelings. The nature of my hypocrisy is such that I’m far more accustomed to dishing it out than I am to taking it. I greatly prefer talking the talk over walking the walk.
Silly me. What was I thinking. And don’t call me Madam. Miss–as in, surely you’re only in your 20s–will be fine…
All right, I will show off my non-caring of names right now. I don’t know any Hollywood names (unless they happen to be so big I can’t help but know them). I usually call actors by their character names (Tom Hanks and Harrison Ford are the only exception–they’re big enough for me to know their names). My biggest sexy-ugly is Edward from Twilight (I hate him, because Edward was supposed to be drop-dead gorgeous…and that guy ISN’T; but he’s still an actor, so I guess that makes him sexy–but I wouldn’t have him for all the money in the world). Now you can taunt me for not knowing any celebrity names (my kids already do).
Well, I would taunt you, but I think we all agree you carry the upper hand with this one. You obviously devote your time to more worthwhile and inspiring pursuits. Maybe some day I’ll grow up. But sadly, I think you have forever broken the heart of the Twilight dude, whatever his name may be…
That’s okay. There are enough 13 year olds out there who make up for my dislike.
Robert Pattinson played Edward Cullen. I too was disappointed that he wasn’t better looking but I definitely wouldn’t categorize him as ugly.
No, definitely not ugly. Although he did need painted on abs. You won’t find Daniel Craig needing ab make-up…
I didn’t think he was that bad in Harry Potter, but the Twilight movies haven’t made me think too highly of him.
I forgot all about him being in Harry Potter. See how much of an impression he made on me?
I love Steven Tyler! So much character.
And he can fit it all into his mouth. That’s the cool part.
Yes! Love the list! I think plenty of ugly people have the sexy thing going for them. And sad to say, there are some very pretty people who have zero sex appeal. My heart really bleeds for them.
I saw on one of the sexy-ugly lists Willem Dafoe, and I’d have to add him to your list. He’s got an edgy thing going on… very watch-able.
You’re right. He definitely deserves inclusion. Edgy and sinister–both sexy qualities in their own right. As evidenced by the popularity of vampire movies and books, anyway.
Thanks for stopping by and lowering yourself to my level.
I’m here to tell you something profound and stupid, a real morsel….I’m going to take you up on that award offer because like the rest of you I don’t have thousands of followers, amassing in the streets and calling my name. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart. End of speech.
Back off Johnny Depp — I think he’s very cool. Ok, not gorgeous, but one of my two favorite actors. Ok, ugly, then, but talented and hot.
I submit Alan Rickman, Jason Issacs, Jeremy Irons, and Owen Wilson — all of whom (according to Google) are not beautiful, but I think they’re hot.
Please do take the award. You are a beautiful blogger!
I don’t think the ladies below (except for one) were putting Johnny on the sexy/ugly list. Quite the opposite. They were putting him on the sexy/handsome/hottie list.
And excellent choices of your own I might add! I agree with all of them. But sadly, still all white men. I’m waiting for someone to find sexy/ugly in a different ethnic background. And no, I really can’t believe I just said that…
Ok, I can easily add Morgan Freeman to the list. He is, in my opinion, gorgeous in a sexy, elegant way.
I thought of him–but I just couldn’t find the sexy. But as long as someone does, that’s all that matters. Consider him added.
That is one sexy monkey! LOL
Totally agree on most of these, especially Steven Tyler. I had a huge crush on him when I was younger, now I look at him and I’m like “What was I thinking?” but there’s still something about him that continues to draw me back in.
I’m gonna have to jump off the bandwagon and go ahead and say that Johnny Depp does NOT belong in this list. I know a million people probably disagree with me but there is nothing sexy about him. I look at him and the only word that I can ever come up with to describe him is “greasy”.
Ha ha! Maybe he needs a new kind of conditioner.
I admire his acting skills more than anything, but I definitely wouldn’t put him on any ugly lists. Or greasy lists!
Thanks for stopping by. I’m about to head over to your new post as we speak!
Congrats! LOL But Oh no! Apparently I missed that “2009″ mugshot you mentioned. Now I’ll have to google Sam. Or maybe not… maybe not
@ GM – Johnny Depp …
A lot of Johnny Depp fans in the house! You have all given me an idea for my next Lazy Blog Day post.
Clever.
I can not comment on the global economy or oil conundrums, so here goes:
I’m right there with you on Tommy Lee Jones, Steven Tyler and Billy Bob.
I was going to attempt to add some names to the roster, but I googled sexy male celebrity images and got kind of hung up on pictures of Johnny Depp. I’d keep that little fella in my back closet and bring him out for fun time, if I could!
And he’d probably fit in there, too. I don’t think he’s too big of a guy. Or maybe your handbag. But yes, I do agree with your assessment.
Of course, now your hubby is going to wonder why you were googling images of sexy male celebrities…
He’s always wondering that, though.
You are landing only home runs today! You’ve kept me laughing all morning, between your comments and your tweets. My blood pressure is now so low (laughing lowers your blood pressure–it’s true!), I don’t dare stand up!
I love this game! Especially if I can play it with a cocktail.
Sexy/Ugly: Chloe Sevigny, but please don’t tell her I said so. I don’t like to be mean either, and you never know when you’re gonna sell a book and movie rights requiring a sexy/ugly actress to play your protagonist. =)
Oh, great, I never thought of that! But since it is not likely in my future, I guess I’ll play a way. I agree with your choice but would definitely weigh her more on the sexy than ugly side.
Thanks for sinking to my level, Stacie. It’s always appreciated.
Ok, I’m so with you on Steven Tyler. He’s always made my list of sexy – even though…
And the dude looks like a lady…
But he’s fun in an elevator.
Even with a ragdoll…
But he knows a chick named Janie, and you want to steer clear of her!
Because she’s Crazy…
(Oh, this is fun–we could do a whole blog post just on this!)
Loved your ugly/beautiful picks! I’d like to add Rick Moranis to the list. He’s not the most attractive man in the world but he sure puts a smile on my face, which makes him beautiful in so many ways.
Thanks for passing on the award to all of us. I think I’ll continue your trend because we’re all beautiful in our own way. Congrats on the win and for spreading the goodness.
He was pretty cute in Ghostbusters. Okay, I just dated myself…
Thanks so much for stopping by and enjoy having a bit of beautiful in your blog’s side bar!
I for one thank you for the cop out, as I have adopted a strict no blogging award policy.
But they do provide good blog fodder. I can usually squeeze a decent post out of one. Well, okay, maybe not decent, but acceptable.
More power to you. Whenever I see of those things come my way, I run faster than Dracula being chased by Gordon Ramsay with a garlic press.
Now that’s an image I’d like to see. Can I google it?
I wrote a sarcastic piece awhile back about playing the blogging award game or not. I decided to, but I display them on my side bar not for bragging rights (because as I mention, they are rare as air) but so that no one feel the need to nominate me for one I already have. And now that I’ve just admitted that, I probably won’t receive any more…
