Views On Vegas: Magic, Debauchery, and Where’s The Freaking Door?
Where do you go to bond with your twelve-year-old son? Why, Las Vegas, of course! Six days of cloudless, searing heat punctuated by clinks and clanks of cascading coins and retina-burning neon signs. Oh, how I embraced her tacky cheese.
My first taste of Las Vegas cheese.
Pocket for a moment your inquiry as to why I would take my child to Sin City—there will be plenty of time to ponder my parenting choices later—and allow me to share a few insights, perceptions no doubt absent from the local visitors’ guide.
Magic
My son is a talented magician. Really, he is. I’m not just saying that because I’m his mama bear. He studies instructional DVDs by the experts, and his skill with card tricks merits a jaw drop. Or at least an eye pop. Thus, magic shows ruled our stay, including Penn & Teller, Criss Angel, and Mac King, all brilliant and exciting. But here’s my magic wish. Just once, I’d like to see a female magician perform, assisted by a scantily clad man, butt cheeks protruding from toddler-sized shorts.
In fact, maybe I’ll study the trade and one day perform at the Luxor, assisted by none other than Criss Angel himself. I’ll clothe him in tiny pants and no shirt. After all, the man likes to showcase his awesome abs. Instead of Criss Angel Believe, it will be Criss and Carrie Absurd. Look for it.
Image credit: xfinity.comcast.net
Where’s the Freaking Door?
Magic shows were not our only path to mysticism. Luckily for us, two Houdini Magic Shops flaunted their make-believe wares within walking distance from our hotel. That meant hours of browsing for my son. And hours of pain for me.
To pass the time, I visited Zoltar, Gypsy fortune-teller extraordinaire, who seduced me with his repetitive foreplay: “I see you over there. Yes, you. Come. Come to Zoltar and let me share with you your fortune.”
Well, how can a girl refuse?
Normally camera-shy, Zoltar made an exception for me.
But as with all seduction, the thrill didn’t last. Sure, he murmured nice things: “You are a virtuous person. You are not easily influenced. You have a keen mind and an understanding nature.” Aww, shucks. Kind of like the spam bloggers receive. But to be honest, what I really desired from the sexy Romanian was a fortune that revealed the secrets to escaping a Las Vegas hotel. Or at the very least, a floor map. Smaktakula of Promethean Times warned me that the “painted whore” would do all she could to trap me in her vacuum of vice, and oh, how right he was. And I don’t even gamble.
Debauchery
Maybe it’s me, but is it really necessary to pass out Booby cards on the sidewalk every five feet? If you’ve never been to Vegas, by Booby cards, I’m talking about the small, glossy T&A pics handed out by a seemingly endless supply of sweaty entrepreneurial representatives. (And no, T&A does not refer to tonsillectomy and adenoidectomy, though, normally, that is my first thought upon hearing the acronym. Yours, too, I’m sure.)
My version of T&A. (Image credit: patient.co.uk)
It seems to me that a greater distribution distance—say every fifty feet or so—would still alert visitors to the city’s ubiquitous sex supply. But in these fine workers’ defense, they did lower their card-dispensing arms as my son and I approached, displaying a conscientious side to their sleaze-spreading nature. Sadly, the trampled path of Booby cards littering the ground rendered this attempt at respectability moot.
If only that trodden trail of sex crumbs could have guided my exit from the dark hotel vortex.
Though it likely did wonders for my son’s sex education.
Have you ever been to Vegas? If so, what’s your favorite attraction? Have you visited the city with kids? Do you collect Booby cards? What about tonsils?
141 Responses to “Views On Vegas: Magic, Debauchery, and Where’s The Freaking Door?”
I’ve been visiting Las Vegas for 44 years – since the strip was half as wide and with much less traffic. When the mob influence burned like a 100 watt bulb. I was there when Kenny Rogers performed free in the Flamingo lounge and when you could tip 20 bucks and get a front row seat at the best shows in town. I’ve seen Hoover Dam several times and enjoyed a helicopter ride to the Grand Canyon complete with champagne lunch near the bottom. I’ve seen lavish stage shows with 100 topless dancers, each better looking than the last. I saw horses thundering on the stage as they pulled stage coaches in Wayne Newton’s show. I’ve seen comedians from the family-oriented Bill Cosby and Rita Rudner to the not-for-kids Buddy Hackett. It was the latter, whose well-delivered blue material had me rolling on the floor with side-splitting stitches from beginning to end. I’ve seen several Cirque du Soleil shows and my favorite is still “Mystere”.
Over the years I learned that although I went to gamble, I had to see at least one show every time I went. And I’ve gone at least 80 times.
Michelle and I absolutely love Vegas and would live there if we could.
If I was the Mayor I would rid the city of the Booby card pushers. I hate the way they flick them as you walk by. They are an eyesore (I mean the men and women flogging them). They used to be at the downtown end of the strip but over the years they have moved pretty much everywhere. I suppose a lot of men (and maybe women) look for sex when in Vegas, but I’ve always figured that “what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” is not quite right – everything stays except the STDs.
Sadly, we haven’t been for nearly three years. We put everything we had into a business. It failed. Starting over. But we will get back to Vegas! Sorry this was so long, Carrie. It’s your blog not mine. But you and those who commented sure did get me going.
No apologies needed. I enjoyed reading it! Gave me some ideas for next time I’m in Vegas. And despite the debauchery, I really liked it too. And what a great place for an aspiring magician like my son. I want to return with my husband. But yes, I would not be sad to see the booby cards go…
Thanks for the comment!
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The deal with those hotels is that they intend for you to get lost in them so you’ll give up and gamble away your big bucks. Kind of like CostCo. They move stuff around to different shelves preventing “dash in for one thing” shoppers. Once you’re in, you’re trapped.
You’re not kidding. People had warned me about this phenomenon, but I didn’t realize the extent of it until I was actually there!
I’m not much of a gambler, but I loved the buffets.
You and many of the other visitors…
We didn’t experience too many buffets. The meal preference for a 12 year old boy is pizza slices. Had a lot of those.
[...] my youngest and I whooped it up in Las Vegas, Mr. Rubin and our oldest completed a 14-day backpacking trip. The trip included two showers. [...]
How cool to have a magician in the family! Yes, Vegas with all its booby cards, blinking lights, and ringing slots is not at the top of my list of places to go, but it is kind of fun every once in a while to partake in the circus…
The circus–perfect description. In fact, we even visited a hotel called Circus Circus. It was a Mecca for kids with a huge arcade, carnival games, and lots of performers. Very noisy and over-stimulating. Needless to say, my son loved it.
It’s taken 24 hours to finally get WordPress to load at work. Odd. Anyway, never been, never want to go, although cirque d soleil sounds cool. Vegas is everything that repels me about my country (including hard workers not getting enough pay, and people who don’t have to work much making bank, while those who can’t afford to lose any, lose it all)(extroverts paradise)… Blegh
Yes, Vegas is far from the best representative for the U.S., that’s for sure. A lot of excess and waste. Then again, as a country, I guess we’re pretty good at that. Not our finest quality.
But the shows are good…
Oh, sorry to hear you are still struggling with Internet issues. I hope you’ve at least received your paychecks.
firefox at work slows down to a tarry mammoth crawl when WordPress opens. I’m watching these words scroll out finally after I’ve already typed 8 words. Pay… pay for May but still none for June. I’d murder for a new job right now. Come to think of it, I might fit in in Vegas. Let’s go back!
I’m sure they’re always looking for showgirls.
ha!
Like Jane, I’ve never been to Vegas, I don’t collect Booby cards, indeed I’ve never heard of them before, and I don’t have much of an opinion on tonsils.
Vegas looks a desperate place to me, but perhaps on the list for one visit in a lifetime … we’ll see.
Great post Carrie
Vegas is a bit desperate–great description–but I guarantee you’d pick up plenty of fodder for your poetry if you went there.
I’ve been to Vegas several times. I love walking around Red Rock Canyon. It’s about 30 minutes from the city. My favorite thing to do in Vegas is catch a show and then walk the strip sipping an alcoholic drink.
I encountered several walkers and sippers. The most eye-catching was near the Paris hotel, where a young man drank from a beverage container shaped like a full-size guitar. I would need a urinary catheter to pull that off…
I’d love to go back and see some of the other geographical sites like Red Rock Canyon. Wouldn’t mind a trek out to the Grand Canyon either.
We used to go to Vegas once a year to compete in the World Archery tournament, but we haven’t been recently. We used to enjoy the food and the shows, but they both got so expensive we lost interest. I understand the prices are a little more reasonable now, so we’ll have to think about going back.
Only problem is, the tournament is in February and all the pools are closed. You never saw such a pathetic sight as two pasty-skinned Canadians wandering around looking for a pool in February: “What do you mean, it’s closed? It’s 70 degrees! That’s summer where we come from!”
Ha ha–it’s funny what’s considered “cold” in warmer climates.
As for the fact you went to Las Vegas for the World Archery tournament? That is beyond cool. You have impressed me immensely. I bet no one messes with you. Not if you’re carrying a bow and arrow, anyway…
True, but it’s not the most portable weapon in the world. My competition bow has a nearly-3-foot-long stabilizer, so I tend not to take it for too many walks in the park.
But oh, what a sight that would be…
As a former collector of baseball cards, I am wondering if booby cards have rookies, all stars, special edition types.
Oh, I’m sure they do. There’s probably a few stats there as well, though you might have to deduce them as they’re not formally listed.
Thanks for dropping by and commenting!
I prefer the cheese on my Domino’s pizza
And it’s about the same quality, too.
Speaking of pizza, when one’s companion is a 12-year-old boy, one consumes a lot of it while traveling.
“… is it really necessary to pass out Booby cards on the sidewalk every five feet?”
Yes. Yes, it is.
Ok, then. That’s good to know. I hadn’t taken the collectors into account…
We took the boys to Vegas last year, first trip back in 15 years. I loved Vegas but this time it felt a little sleazy largely because of the booby cards – they weren’t there last time. But it’s not just the cards it’s that whole flick of the wrist popping action the card issuers have!
I’d go back again simply to see how big, kitschy and confusing the newest resort can get.
Oh, that’s a good one–you’re right, the card handlers do have a flick of the wrist when they hand those babies out! Real pros they are.
I could have used a GPS. At first I thought it was just me. After all, there are signs in the hotels. But then I saw many other people also complain about how lost they were, and I felt better. Safety in numbers.
First I must say I’m out of my league because I have no idea who Criss Angel is, although I don’t lose any sleep over it.
I’ve been to Vegas once and it was for work. What a dump. All fake. Fake town, fake people, fake boobs, fake fun, and all in the stinking desert. It’s only 45 minutes by air from San Diego but I can’t imagine going there for any reason. If you want to be entertained, watch the San Diego strippers get on the planes to Vegas on Friday and back on Monday. Lovely. I want to say I hope my kids never go there but I’d be dreaming, right?
You’re very brave for taking your son there and I’m sure he enjoyed the magic show. Maybe he learned something from this experience, besides the T&A cards. You’re a good mom for acting as a shield!
Ha ha–I love how you tell it like it is. No beating around the bush for you.
And you’re right, it is fakery at its finest, not to mention loud and over-stimulating. It was always a treat to return to our quiet hotel room. But we still had a great time, and it was a magic Mecca, which delighted my son to no end. Since we’ve returned, he’s attacked his magic practice with even more intensity. Maybe next time, he’ll be so skilled that he can make those booby cards disappear.
Haha, sorry but Vegas doesn’t need any more sugar coating! A few years ago, when home prices were ballooning in San Diego, many families were cashing in and moving to Vegas to buy something bigger with the profits. You couldn’t pay be enough to live there! I think many of them forgot it’s a complete desert as soon as you leave sin city.
Oh, and if your son makes the booby cards disappear, I’d be concerned to know where they end up.
Ha ha–me, too! As for living in Vegas, that is a scary thought.
I have never been to Vegas and to be honest, I have no desire to go there. I’ve never even been to a casino, even though there is one located about 30 minutes away from where I live. I am afraid that if I tried gambling, I might lose the house and a couple of kids by the time I’m done. Best to stay away.
I never had any desire to go there either, as I, too, am not a gambler. But I was surprised how much I liked it. Part of it was probably seeing my son’s excitement–if one wants to see magic shows, Vegas seems the place to be. I’d like to go back, just to see all the things we missed, though I don’t think I’ll make it a regular stop. It certainly provided good writing research.
I guess it did. I’m glad that you and your son enjoyed it as much as you did. I guess I’d probably enjoy some of the live shows. I’d still avoid the casinos though.
And that makes you a smart woman!
Don’t know how smart that makes me, but I just know myself and my weaknesses enough to avoid things that might get me into trouble. It’s good to know that all of those terrible things I did in my youth have actually prepared me to avoid awful things today. Nice to know I didn’t suffer for nothing.
I’ve never been to Vegas, I don’t collect Booby cards, and I dont’ have much of an opinion on tonsils. I just wanted to make a general comment on how great this post is.
Well, thank you! I appreciate you stopping by. And now, if you ever do get the urge to collect booby cards, you’ll know where to go.
I spent a bunch of weekends in Vegas for a fashion gig a few years ago. My favorite parts were my room with a gigantic hot tub in the middle of it and an expansive view (free upgrade since I wasn’t out gambling, apparently
), and seeing Elton John perform live and up close. Wow. I thought it might somehow be cheesy, being in Vegas and all, but nope. He was brilliant.
Your room sounds a little nicer than the one we had. But at the price we paid, I can’t complain. We stayed at the Luxor, because that’s where Criss Angel lives and performs, and my son hoped he’d run in to him.
And I bet Elton John was wonderful. He’d be great to see live.
Whoa. Look at all the comments here! Whoa.
I hate Las Vegas. I passed up a trip there with my husband in June because he has to go there again in October (when I WILL go with him) because it is sensory overload. Plus, he has meetings and I have to walk for a day and a half to get from the hotel room to the pool. God forbid you forget your sunscreen. Then it is a day and a half walk back to the room to get it, or $49 for 3 ounces of SPF -2 in the hotel gift shop.
It definitely is sensory overload, and those hotel mazes about drove me nuts. But on the bright side, I got a lot of extra walking in. We only spent a couple hours at the pool. So much else to do (and by “else” I mean magic things for my son…)
But I still enjoyed it and will likely go back.
If we didn’t go to Vegas at least once a year for his conferences, I wouldn’t be so sour on it. But I’ve done Vegas. The casinos, the shows, the pool . . . BUT, I never turn down a trip with my husband! Well, I guess I turned down LV in June, didn’t I?
Given it was over 100 degrees every day while we were there, you probably made a wise choice.
Over 100 makes it hard to even sit by the pool. Unless you are sitting IN it.
Which we were. Among the pee and everything.
If your son isn’t already aware, there’s an up-and-coming magician in the UK by the name of Dynamo who I’d be interested to see deciphered. Have either of you heard of a fellow named Derren Brown? He’s massive over here, and might spark your son’s interest in psychology – all of his tricks are based around the power of suggestion on a deeply psychological level, and he can’t be recommended enough!
Zoltar looks like such a dude!
My son says he’s heard of Dynamo, and I’m not surprised considering all of the time he spends on magic sites and educational DVDs. Not Derren Brown, though. I suspect he’ll check into him now. Sounds interesting.
And yes, Zoltar’s one testosterone-fueled man. One only need look at the facial hair to see that. Oh. Sorry. Forgot about that whole beard thing…
I believe Derren Brown refers to himself as an illusionist, and is probably much closer to psychology than magic, but it’s enthralling stuff and well worth a watch. He does exposés and documentaries about all manner of mind games. One related example is where he convinced someone to gamble all their savings on a roulette table, using suggestion to bolster their confidence in what was actually blind luck. I think they ended up winning!
He also broadcast an experiment with psycho-suggestive sound and noise to trap people in their chairs, and I remember a good programme where by putting pictures of his face and suggestive imagery involving generosity around a shopping centre, he begged £5000 in two hours (which he gave to real homeless people). One man even gave Derren his shoes, which were the intended subject of a very specific altered advert in one of the stores. Again, it’s not strictly speaking magic, but it should at least provide some inspiration for your son.
I’m flattered you remembered! Although if I’m to be known throughout WordPress for that post I ought to do one entitled ‘By the way I am actually a proper man.’
Naahhh, no one wants to remember the decent stuff.
My son and I were just discussing the fact that so many magicians now call themselves illusionists instead of magicians. But this man’s work sounds rather unique, a nice change of pace from the usual. Thanks for passing on the name.
No problem, I’d be interested to hear your thoughts.
I’m touched that you went to Las Vegas so that your son could expand his knowledge in the field of magic. I loved Vegas. We went when it was still sleazy in the late eighties. I liked observing the people who were glued to their seats behind the slot machines, with cigarette butts piled up to the ceiling. These people probably had a gambling addiction. They were so obviously desolate.
Oh, they’re still there, believe me. And so are the cigarettes.
Well, given my son has maintained this magic interest since the age of 6 and has risen to a level where he can no longer be brushed off as a “cute kid doing magic,” I thought, what the heck. I’d like to see Vegas, and he can get exposed to the mecca of magic. My hubby and other son went on a two week backpacking trip (yikes!), so it was good timing.
Hello there,
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http://nyparrot.wordpress.com/2012/07/02/you-think-you-know-me-but-you-dont-writing-a-blog-is-rewarding/
Thanks for inspiring me, and may inspiration be always present in abundance in your life!
Thanks so much! I appreciate the recognition. You are very kind.
Hey, you make it easy to be kind to you!
Okay, now I’m just blushing….
Love your posts, Carrie. You really are very funny. No, haven’t done Vegas yet. (I’d be there to see Donny Osmond anyway–what does that say about me, lol?) I do, however, like Cris Angel. My son was into his show for a while and went through a magic phase. He’s graduated to acoustic guitar. A lot better on my ears and nothing goes disappearing in my house.
Ha ha–well, my son continues with the magic (has kept it up for six years) and switched from an acoustic guitar to an electric one. And he plays trombone. Doesn’t bode well for me, does it?
I saw plenty of ads for the Donny and Marie show in Las Vegas, so I’m sure you’d be in good company.
Thanks for the kind words. Is always a treat after a long day.
Donny AND Marie–my dweeb self would be in Osmond heaven w/my two favorites! As per you, electric guitars and trombones, I suppose how much time you spend in the house will decide how impacted you are by all the music surrounding you, lol.
You’re welcome. Thanks for being such a wonderful supporter at my blog. I really appreciate it.
No problem. I always enjoy your take on a variety of topics.
Same here. Hey, have you signed up with the WANA tribe? Check it out and add me as a friend or vice versa: http://www.wanatribe,ning.com (FB might have a little competition, lol. Collection of creative artists who gather together to serve and help each other. It’s pretty awesome so far
I’m not much of a joiner, though I’ve certainly seen that acronym floating around.
I can’t keep up with all the social media stuff, but I do like this group. I also keep saying I’m going to delve into Goodreads but I keep forgetting to do so. I also end up a bit overwhelmed there. So much going on I can’t take it all in.
I meant to say that magic shows scare me a little bit. I imagine she really is being sawed in half but I wouldn’t mind seeing the scantly clad man
The cutting-the-woman in half trick has definitely changed over the years, so you’d probably like it even less now. Criss Angel “sawed” a woman in half, and blood went spraying and intestines dangled. Nice, huh?
PIcture the woman (me) in the third row passing out while she desperately tries to make her way up the aisle. Not pretty.
He said someone did pass out during a recent show. Had to call the ambulance for her. But he was probably fibbing in order to make the trick even more exciting.
I’ve never been but I admire your bravery in doing this great thing for your little boy. I imagine he had a fantastic time in magic land and hopefully you picked up some things to slip into the odd book or two.
Oh, yes, everything I took in will help fuel my fiction writing, that’s for sure.
My son is so serious about magic, and it hasn’t let up for the past six years, so I thought it was a nice opportunity for us given the older son and hubby were off on a backpacking trip. Always good to have one-on-one time with kids but is difficult to do as I’m sure you know.
I ❤ Vegas. But then Vegas to me is also Henderson and home and my kids and grandkids and fellow writers and church all the wonderful friends I left behind. I’ve seen some awesome shows from Cirque du Soleil, Bette Midler, BB King, Santana, taping of Ellen, to local shows like The Scintas, Rita Rudner, the back room cheesy blue comedy of friends trying to become comedians … to the Vegas Ghost Tour. Shelley and I went to a call for a video with Rascall Flatts. There’s always a call for extras for something. On my to do list is the Mob Museum (because a fellow author is associated with it,) and Shelley and I will do the zipline on Freemont street next trip. (In prep for the zipline in Boulder City.) There’s the stratosphere, the dolphins, free jazz on the lawn at Lake Las Vegas, B Ball at UNLV … Oh and the Pawn Stars are on the strip… I could go on and on.
Always changing never ending things to do… OH … And the Zappos marathon.
But you know what my very favorite little known place is? The Clark County Heritage Museum on Boulder Highway, Henderson. It costs $1.50 and is the best time
If you’re in to La La Land. 
Sorry this is so long again! GREAT post and so glad your son got to meet P&T. I’ll bet he’s still on cloud nine
Nothing at all wrong with bonding in Vegas. 
Thanks for listing all of those great shows/places. Gives me some ideas for next time. I’m sure my hubby and boys would enjoy the Mob Museum. I saw it on my map but didn’t have the chance to get there.
I loved the city. It’s amazing how easily I could tune out the sleaze. Once I go back with the rest of the family, I want to ride the roller coaster outside the New York hotel. My youngest wasn’t quite ready for that.
He was thrilled to meet Penn and Teller, and even more so Mac King, who took the time to talk with him after the show. He seemed pretty impressed with my son’s magic knowledge and was pleased that he had studied some of his DVDs and books.
All in all a great time!
OH … PS! I bet you all would love the CSI Experience at MGM? OK I’ll stop now
We wanted to see that, but so much to do, so little time. The mission of the trip was magic, and that we accomplished, indeed.
Yes there is and yes you did. You are a very good mom to recognize, encourage and to help your son explore this ‘calling.’
Thank you. I keep thinking he’ll lose interest, but he only studies it longer and harder as he gets older. Who am I to crush his dreams? But as I told another commenter, luckily engineering is second on his what-I-want-to-be list.
I’m supposed to go to Vegas in a couple of weeks. Clearly I will keep all of your stops in mind….and will absolutely collect booby cards.
I somehow suspect your experience without a child in tow will be vastly different from my own.
Have a great time. I’m sure you’ll love it. And I’m sure all of those young men I saw–the ones drinking from beverage containers shaped as full-sized guitars–will love you. Watch your hiney!
I hope the magic shows were all your son dreamed of! The booby cards people are big pains! It goes to show you how much $$$ they’re making off that smut that the sidewalks are littered every hour with an inch of throw away cards that they printed, and taxi drivers are tipped $100 for bringing patrons to certain strip clubs, etc, etc. I hate my city’s image. There is a good side, but that isn’t publicized, sadly…just the ‘cheese.’
I thought the same thing–how much money those establishments must bring in to be able to pay so many people to distribute them. But despite the sleaze, we had a great time. And my son was thrilled to see all of those magic shows and was especially thrilled to get his photo taken with Penn and Teller and Mac King. Mac King even spent time with my son after the show talking magic technique with him. It was a treat to see.
We’ll go back I’m sure.
That is awesome! Glad he got some one on one attention! I’ll be excited to see him when he’s famous someday (but hopefully not in a skimpy speedo with you doing the magic…I might pass on that–not to knock your magic ability…but I just really don’t like guys in speedos).
Yes, an assistant in speedos would be a real turn off.
It’s a fine balance when you have a child whose goal is to be a famous magician. You don’t want to discourage him, but you also don’t want to set him up for unrealistic outcomes. I try to take a back seat and just let him roll with it. After all, I don’t want to be like David Copperfield’s father, who apparently told his son that his “magic thing” would never amount to anything (or so Copperfield told the audience in the show we saw two years ago). Oops. But my son has maintained his interest for six years now, so who am I to tell him it’s an unattainable goal? Luckily, he’s also interested in becoming an engineer.
Yes, it’s hard to turn them from something they love when they are so determined. My oldest wants (and has always wanted) to be an architect. We’ve tried to steer her toward the engineering field, but it just makes her that much more determined to stay. And you know what…if anyone is going to become a dang good architect…it’s her. She’s amazing. So I’ve stopped fighting her.
Seems a lofty profession. Especially if she’s interested in designing energy-efficient buildings. But one never knows. I was going to be a French teacher, and look how well that turned out.
Wii Wii! Isn’t that French? Ooops! Nope. That’s what my son plays.
Oh, I know it well!
As a dedicated Vegas visitor for over 10 years, I have read probably near 1000 trip reports from mentally ill Vegas-addicts such as myself however none as funny as yours. Yes and I have even taken my 2 kids (ages 8 and 10 at the time) there as well. There is nothing like porn slappers and half naked waitresses to spark up a healthy family conversation during dinner. Would I do it again? Sure…they had fun, we had fun, grandparents (who came with) had fun…and we have the memoreis too. Your first time? You’ll be back…over and over….we always get hooked
Great blog, loved it! Stop over to mine, there is a Vegas trip report on there and more to come. Have a great Monday.
I enjoyed it much more than I thought I would (it was my first time), and I’ll definitely go back; this time with the whole family. Yes, there’s debauchery, but there’s also a lot of stuff to do with kids (mine are 12 and 15). I want to try the roller coaster around the New York hotel next time. My youngest wasn’t in to that, so I missed out.
Thanks for the kind words, and thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting. I appreciate it.
My gawd, woman this was hilarious!!!! Good luck with the magic thing. I’m with you, would love to see a female magician with a male assistant “butt cheeks protruding from toddler-sized shorts.” GREAT. And the T&A thing — all so funny. I’ve never been to the Painted Whore (HA) but my sis has and she carried her two kids this time (her husband had business there), but she summed it pretty much the same way you did. Great read, Carrie– thanks for this.
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Thanks for the kind words! But I can’t take credit for the quote “painted whore.” That was Smaktakula from Promethean Times.
My son and I had a great time, despite the debauchery. At twelve, he tuned most of that out. Can’t say my 15 year old would do the same if he’d been with us.
Thanks for stopping by and giving me some warm fuzzies.
God help me, I loooovvve Vegas. I truly do. I love it in all its loud, raucous, over-the-top, gawdy, trashy goodness. There’s a ton of stuff to do besides the drinking and gambling but to be honest, I love the drinking and gambling too. I had my bachelorette party in Vegas and it was awesome. And the ho cards are funny, but I got tired of walking down the Strip and having those guys smack the cards on their hands before thrusting them out to everyone.
I may have to plan my next trip over there, it’s been too long. Sigh.
Glad to hear you like the sinful city. Makes me feel less guilty admitting I loved it, too. There is so much to do, and although I obviously didn’t gamble or drink this time around given my travel companion’s age, I wouldn’t mind checking out a few of those slot machines next time when the hubby’s with us. Not that I’m much of a gambler, but it would be fun to have a go at it. And I know Mr. Rubin would feel all he-man at the poker tables.
Never been to Vegas! Sounds like you had a great vacation. I have seen Criss Angel on tv before – he was pretty cool…(abs and all)
It was a great trip. It’s possible to have fun with a child there and ignore the rest. And the Criss Angel show was fantastic. He’s very charismatic. I can see why the ladies like him.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting.
I’m glad you and your boy had a good time. It doesn’t always matter where you go, but it sometimes matters what you do and who you go with. You guys will always have this.
I live about seven hours from Vegas, but have only been there a handful of times (a couple college trips, a wedding, a trip to illegally buy a ferret and most recently, a concert). I don’t know what it is that I so despise about Las Vegas. Maybe it’s the cynical way the city parts you from your cash without ever offering you anything in return (unless, like you guys, your trip involves mutual activities and plenty of Booby Cards), or how, after all the vulgar pancake makeup is peeled away, the city’s not that risque or wild after all, but a rather pedestrian place for middle-aged chain-smokers to piss away their money.
Still, I think you’ve done a really wonderful thing. And it doesn’t matter if it’s Las Vegas or Beirut, spending time with your son will pay huge dividends for the rest of your life. But you probably know that as well or better than I do.
I hope you enjoy “Man’s Search.” I found it a very rewarding and influential book.
I was surprised by how much I liked the place. Plenty to do to keep entertained that doesn’t involve gambling or smut. And you’re right–my son and I made some great memories. Seeing the excitement on his face to meet Penn and Teller after the show, and getting to spend time talking to Mac King about magic technique, was a parental treat. Of course, I suspect other “attractions” would light up my oldest son’s face, not that he’ll get anywhere near them on my watch…
I’m about a third of the way into “Man’s Search for Meaning.” Is tough to read but necessary. Hard to whine about one’s lot in life after reading these passages.
sounds like a great trip and one he will always remember
Absolutely. It was worth it to see his face when he met most of the magicians after the shows.
oh how sweet hope you took loads of photos for him to keep
Oh, I did!
Lets see tonsils nope I had them out in the third grade that’s when my love afair with the orange popscile began. Vegas yes my parents use to like to go and gamble and would take us along Circus Circus was fun. Staking out slot machines telling my mom which machine was about to pay off. I missed the shows that would have been fun. Sounds like you guys had a wonderful time! I’m glad you guys went it will be one of the fond memories I am sure. Boobie cards I don’t remember boobie cards maybe that’s a new thing. Any glad you had a good time and I’m also glad your back.
Thanks, Starla. We had a great time, and you’re right, the memories will last a lifetime. Such a treat to see my son interact with the magicians after the show. Mac King was quite impressed with his magic knowledge.
We went to Circus Circus. Let’s just say, my son was in heaven. What an amazing place for a kid. I think we’ll go back to Vegas, but next time with the whole family.
If I had never read your blog before, and based upon the cards being peddled, after the two paragraphs I might have been thinking – Oh no, she’s taken her son to get him a hooker, for his “first time”, and has 6 days to work out how. Followed by 5 days of something else. – But as you know I have read before and knew why you were going.
Glad you had a nice time. The card thing is odd isn’t it. You and your clearly pregnant wife fancy a sex show? – Er, no thanks, we just want to get out of the heat.
Still I do like a visit, there is plenty to do once you start exploring, and I have no interest in gambling. Plus cannot beat some of the buffets. I once had a breakfast so big at Paris, that I felt sick for the next two hours.
If you have ever seen Pawn stars on the history channel, their shop is just up the strip, not far past stratosphere. Probably should have mentioned that a week ago.
I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the city. Of course, I approached it differently than most would–no gambling, no sleaze-seeking, no drinking. But it was beyond special to see my son in all of his magic glory. Seeing him pose for photos with Penn and Teller and Mac King, and then having discussions about magic techniques with Mac King and being singled out in the audience by him made everything worth it. Every kid deserves their spot in the sun at least once. This was his.
I’d like to say I can’t believe they thrust booby cards out to you and your pregnant wife, but sadly, I can believe it. It seems no one was off limits except–thankfully–people with children. Nice to know they have scruples.
That is really cool that he got to pose for pictures and got to have discussions and what not. I bet he loved that trip. I bet he got inspired a whole lot more.
A friend of mine had her 10 year old daughter with her and got a few cards thrust her way, although thankfully not many. I think some of the card handlers are just not looking at what they are doing some of the time.
What a job. And in 105 degree heat.
I would like to think these people are doing the job as they are struggling to find anything else to do to support themselves. And I suppose they could justify it with “well it is Vegas…”
Judging by the number of women passing out cards, I think you’re right.
I also married in Vegas after many discussions we finally decided to use an already planned holiday for the girls to marry.
I love Vegas, though I have always liked Reno more.
I was surprised by how much I liked it. Sure, there’s sleaze and gambling and staggering drunks (so what else is new…), but there’s also a lot more. I want to return with the whole family next time and see some of the sights we didn’t get the chance to.
Love your idea of a magic act – If, by some chance, you don’t get have your idea of fulfilled you might want to check out “Magic Mike” instead – lots of male butt cheeks on display
Glad to see you back girlie!!
Thanks. It’s nice to be back home. I kind of felt like I needed a long shower after that visit…
I may have to give “Magic Mike” a peek, though it’s kind of sad to imagine a theater full of middle-aged women getting their jollies.
There was one guy in the theatre when I went, with his girlfriend or wife… it was funny because you could tell he was ready to get out of there as soon as the movie ended. By the way, you may have a similar response of needing a shower after the movie, too!
Good to know.
But it’s about time. How many of us women have had to suffer through the female full frontal while seated next to our mates?
I actually got married there, in The Little White Chapel (Joan Collins Was Married Here!) which now sports a drive up window so you don’t even have to get out of your F250. Lovely, how romantic. And a trip to the “chapel” with a guy named Roy in a ten-year old limo. How’s that for cheese? But at least the marriage worked out.
And what a story you have to tell! I love that you can just drive up and get married. That really is the ultimate in tacky cheese.
Glad the marriage worked out!
We flew to the Las Vegas airport for a southern California vacation once and spent the last afternoon/evening there before our flight home. We stayed on the Strip, just to say we’d done it.
Okay, been there. Done that. I don’t need a return trip! I don’t gamble, I’m not into shows, and well, hubby and I don’t need the other “attractions” of the place. We weren’t offered the cards, but we hated running the gambit of hawkers trying to get us into their casinos.
It’s definitely on my list of places not requiring a return visit.
That’s funny, because I’d love to go back there, this time with the whole family (my oldest son and his dad took a 14-day backpacking trip instead.) Yes, it can be sleazy, but I was surprised by how much there is to do with kids. So many arcades, rides, cool shops, fun shows. That being said, I don’t think it’s a place I need to return to on a regular basis. Seeing a bunch of young drunk men stumbling around, acting like fools is a sight that wears out quickly.
But it was a really nice way to get my son exposure to a lot of magic. He got his photo taken with both Penn and Teller and also Mac King. He was in heaven.
I’m glad you both had a good time—that’s the important thing! And you probably scored some good brownie points with your son for taking him there to see the real pros.
Magicians, I mean! 
I did. It was nice to have one-on-one time with him, and we’ll have some great memories.
I went to Vegas just this spring. That was enough. Been there, done that.
I did enjoy the Cirque Del Soli Beatles show. Well worth the entire trip. We went to see the shop Pawn Stars is filmed in. Hoover Damn was pretty interesting. No kids. Didn’t keep the booby cards. Made $40 bucks.
We saw Cirque Du Soleil’s Ka. Really liked it. And the magic shows were wonderful. I will definitely go back, this time with the whole family. Yes, there’s plenty of debauchery, but there’s so much to see and do. My son loved it, and although I’m ashamed to admit it, I did, too. Didn’t gamble once though, so I’m sure the hotel wouldn’t be pleased with me. Next time I’d like to see other things like Hoover Dam and maybe even travel further and see the Grand Canyon.
Luckily, my pre-teen was mostly oblivious to the booby cards. Not so sure my 15 year old would be though…
We saw Ka, but after the Beetles so it was a let down. If we’d have seen it first it would have been great. I did like the fight scenes on that vertical stage.
Oh, man–we were going to do the Beatles show and then decided on Ka instead. Next time, I guess.
But yes, I was impressed by their anti-gravity antics!
Well I think we all know what T&A reaaaaally stands for, don’t we?
Oh yes, we do: Tangvayosaurus & Abrictosaurus – the two undeniably most famous dinosaurs!
Happy to see you’ve managed to escape from the madness. Welcome back! Also, looking very much forward to that show of yours (although not as much to the semi-naked Chris Angel)!
Well, if you don’t want to see a semi-nude Criss Angel, I’m sure there will be plenty of other visual delights for you, something more suitable to your tastes. In fact, I guarantee there will be, such is the sleaze of the city.
And you’re right. That is precisely what the real T&A stands for. I just can’t pronounce those words…
When we took the Big Worrells to Vegas, Big T. collected ho cards, as we called them. There was this safe in our room. We didn’t keep money inside, but he put his ho cards there. Oh, the joys of a 15 year old boy!
Ha ha–I guess it’s lucky my 15 year-old-son didn’t accompany us (he took a 14-day backpacking trip with his dad instead). But what a good use of the hotel safe!
In all seriousness, it was a bit awkward at times with my son, but all we can do as parents is have open discussions with our kids about the realities of the world and try to instill a decent moral compass. That and hope they don’t notice all of the sleaze.
Ha! Loved the virtual stroll through booby-carded lobbies. Ah, I can smell the cheese from here!
I’m glad you and your son had a good time. May I suggest Channing Tatum as your future assistant? Not that I’ve noticed, but he might fit the bill as far as tiny shorts.
So, you were first in line for the “Magic Mike” movie, huh? I kind of thought there was a wild side to you…
Was this your first time, there?
It was. But it won’t be my last.
You took your son to visit the capital of the United States of America? How patriotic of you Carrie! Please tell Barack and Michelle I say hello. They’re so lucky to have lived at the Wynn for the past 3-1/2 years…craps and roulette 24/7. What more could the Commander of the Free World want? I hope your son got his autograph!
Always aiming to better my children, I am. But sadly, the Obamas were too busy playing poker to sign an autograph for my son. I hear they won big. Something about the Supreme Court and a health care law…
