Hey, That’s Not Me!
Today’s post will be short, though probably not sweet. In order to make it sweet, I’d have to bring chocolate. The chocolate I have hidden in the back of my fridge. And that’s not going to happen.
As most of you know, my novel comes out in September, either on the first or the fifteenth, but unlike those restrictive Ten Commandments, release dates are not set in stone.
Image credit Microsoft Clip Art
So now comes the time to dish—both about the book and the process behind it. But how to do so without alienating those who don’t give a poo, while appeasing those who do?
As always, I’ll follow the houseguest and fish rule. I’ve mentioned this tenet before. You know, the one that says houseguests are like fish? After three days they both start to stink.
Therefore, after today’s post, I’ll publish three entries:
1) My book blurb and cover art.
2) A condensed chronicle of my eight-year writing journey, or what I like to call: “What took so long?”
3) What happened after signing with the publisher, especially as relates to the editing process.
And that will be it. I promise. At least until the post announcing the book’s release. And the post on marketing anxiety. And the post on my fear of book reviews. And the post on…
But before I go, let me leave you with the following pictorial representation of my latest humiliation. These photos I took are of my publisher’s website, the page that lists upcoming releases. Look at the third book down in the September section. I’ve included a zoomed-in image for my fellow myopics.
See that? The Seneca Scourge? Yep, that’s my book.
But who the hell is Connie Rubin?!
Lovely. As if my self-confidence as a writer wasn’t low enough. Thank you, Sir, may I have another?…
The Animal House paddling. Image credit: www.theblaze.com
163 Responses to “Hey, That’s Not Me!”
[...] That last sentence means Connie has left the building. I have a book to read [...]
[...] online shopping sites. I am in no way affiliated with this business, and they don’t know me from Connie, but I’d be lost without them. Collage Video, a Minneapolis-based, family-owned business, sells a [...]
What a meany – not bringing chocolate. Well done and good luck with the book.
I know–hoarding the chocolate for myself. Not very charitable of me, is it?
Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting on a couple of my posts. I appreciate it! Oh, and I look forward to your tweets.
[...] I bet it was Connie*… [...]
[...] promised, today’s post will be the last in my three-part series introducing my novel, The Seneca Scourge. From contract to errata. How sexy is that? Hey, big [...]
Connie?! For Real?! Off with their heads!
But still…..congratulations on impending awesomesauce!
“Awesomesauce”–I like that! And so does Connie.
Thanks!
Connie IS the awesomesauce.
[...] next post, I’ll share my experience since signing the contract. Remember, I told you I’d post three entries related to my novel, and then I’d shut up about it. Until the novel’s release, that [...]
How exciting and good luck….connie!
Thank you! Connie needs all the luck she can get.
I am so thrilled and excited for both of you!
Can’t wait to see the book in real life!
Thank you! That’s always a treat to hear.
Yeah Carrie!!!! I am so happy for you! Now the fun part starts!
Or the horrifying part–the part where people actually read what I wrote and the part where I have absolutely no experience in marketing. Oh, that dang glass half-empty really stinks…
Connie, I always love your posts. ; ) How exciting that the publishing date is almost here!!!!!
And FYI… I am one of the bunch who would love more publishing/writing/marketing posts. I won’t be alienated, no sir.
Oh, good, because I suspect there are more of those posts to come. But Connie enjoys the mindless stuff, too, so there’ll probably be plenty of that as well.
Thanks for stopping by, Anne. As always, I appreciate it.
I hope your publisher changes it – that’s very annoying! There will come a time when they know your name and fear it! Btw, are you going to be published online as well?
Hopefully they’ll get it changed. Both my editor and I have sent off an email. Don’t want to be known as “Connie” in their files.
My book will mostly be e-book format. There will be a POD option, though I suspect the print format may come a couple weeks after the e-book release. I’m still not clear on the details.
Congratulations on being published – such good news. I’m looking forward to the posts about your journey already, whoever they’re written by.
Thank you! Hopefully, I’ll have wrestled the manuscript away from Connie by that time.
I’m so happy for you, Connie! This is a major, awesome accomplishment that gives me warm fuzzies and am happy to have found your post. Ha ha ha! I couldn’t resist. AFter writing your wrong name (which made me boo and hiss at those proofreaders falling asleep on their job), I went into spam-arama mode or poor English speaking automaton. I’ve read too many spam comments. I’m starting to sound like them now. But seriously, Connie, I’m excited for upcoming book posts. At least they spelled your book name correct.
Yes, the spammers have been out in full force lately, haven’t they? I keep getting spam for designer shoes, which is weird considering how boring my footwear is. But on second thought, maybe it’s Connie that wears the fancy shoes. Sounds like a Connie to me.
I’m going to block Connie Rubin from my site so I don’t get shoe ads. My daughter would go crazy for those.
Ha ha–sounds like a good idea.
I don’t wish to give you needless doubts, but are you absolutely certain that there isn’t someone out there called Connie Rubin who might have stolen your manuscript and masqueraded as you to earn what is rightfully your publishing contract?
If I was going to get your name wrong, I’d at least do it with some panache. Congratulations, Reuben!
Ha ha!! You’re right, “Connie” doesn’t offer much panache. Perhaps Cleopatra Rubin or Cornelius Rubin would be better? But it’s all good, because if the book stinks, I can just blame Connie…
That, Connie eh? What is she like!?
A troublemaker, pure and simple.
The world will know who Carrie Rubin is soon
How exciting! Not long to go!
Well, I don’t know about the world, but maybe a few people.
Thanks for stopping by!
I am going to bet that Connie is someone’s Wife or Mother-in-Law and they just had a fight. That is not really a Typo but rather a Freudian Slip. It will be corrected, just beat them over the head with your request to remain Carrie.
Congrats on the publishing date, it is so close! You have earned bragging rights, so brag all you like we all want to hear the travails and trials. Someday some of might want to follow in your footsteps.
Thank you! Nice to hear.
As for the whole Connie thing, I’m thinking the person who typed it probably has horrible vision like me and just didn’t have their reading glasses on.
You never fail to make me lol, Carrie–or is it Connie? Thanks for sharing! Looking forward to the ‘detailed’ posts to come!
Thanks, Joanna. Of course, given my own personal word count limit, the posts likely won’t be too detailed. Or too dignified…
Dignity-schmignity. Your posts always get me smiling. Keep at them
This is brilliant Carrie! Congratulations on getting a /publisher/! Congratulations on /being/ published and congratulations on the upcoming launch. You are living the dream girl and you can talk about it as much as you want. I for one won’t be bored.
One thing though – with that typo? Don’t just shrug it off. It may just be a typo or it may be something wrong deep in their database. If you don’t query it you may have to change your name to ‘Connie’ by deed poll when you book hits the bestseller lists. Get them to fix it now!
Thank you! For both the encouragement and the nice words. Much appreciated. And yes, I’ve contacted them, and hopefully it will get changed, though I haven’t heard back yet. I really don’t want to change my name to Connie.
You’re very welcome Carrie! It always feels like christmas when one of us attains the dream. Don’t forget to keep us posted!
Well, Santa didn’t bring me a big publishing house, but at least he got my toe in the door.
Just make sure you’re wearing steel-toed boots so you can make that crack get wider! If you don’t have any heavy duty boots yet then I’m sure Santa will provide
Will do.
OH NOOooooo!!! Typos everywhere these dats … I mean days
I’ll bet it’ll be smooth sailing from here on out!!! I’m so excited for you. Seriously! Wow just a few more weeks 
Thank you! And yes, Here’s hoping for smooth sailing.
Haha, how awful! Somebody must have been sleeping at the keyboard that day. The good thing is, it’s online and not in print, so it’s easy and fast to fix.
I have people regularly call me Mike when they reply to an email I sent them and they don’t know me. My friend Laura complains people call her Lauren all the time, even people she knows! I think many people have little consideration for names somehow. Do you agree, Karen?
All three of us agree–Karen, Connie, and Carrie. But now, I’m feeling a bit like Sybil. (Have you ever seen that movie or read the book? It is intense.)
Hopefully they will rectify the problem. I don’t mind so much to have the typo on the release page; I just hope they don’t have me in their files as Connie!
Let’s hope whatever name they have for you, your book is successful and you can cash the royalty checks!
Yes, all $1.39 of them.
Oh, do dish about the process! You make everything interesting with your humor.
Thank you! Nice of you to say.
So dish it is!
Amazing how the eye can just completely miss such typos … I didn’t spot it until you pointed it out ~ doh ~ can’t wait for release day Carrie
Thanks, Polly!
Thank the Lord you did your own editing! Nice title, though. Very best of luck with the launch, Carrie.
Thank you! I did have an editor, and then even a senior editor, but I saw the final galley, and all appears to be the way I last left it. Hopefully. At least my name is correct.
I’m very excited for you Carrie or Connie….wait…who are you again?
Connie, Carrie, maybe even Conner. It’s all good. And thank you!
Congratulations!! I am looking forward to your posts about the process. Best wishes on its release!
Thank you so much. I appreciate that.
Ugh. Face palm. How annoying that they got your name wrong! But at least you’re near the end of the road. Oh, and you also got one of my favorite Beach Boys songs in my head with the title of this post!
End of the road for the publishing; beginning of the road for the marketing. Yikes.
Sorry to get an ear worm in your head. Or at least I think that’s what those tunes that keep playing in our heads are called.
Thanks for stopping by.
This is so cool!
All except the part where Connie stole my book.
I’m keen to hear about your writing adventures and success too, Connie. Perhaps my glogging buddy, Carrie can benefit from your experiences. So excited for you!!
I meant blogging of course, but maybe glogging is what you do when you blog underwater, d’oh!
Ha ha!! That was such a good one, I’m not going to correct your typo. What a way to put the spin on.
Thank you! Yeah, I taught that Carrie everything she knows. Then she goes and tries to take all the credit.
Congratulations Connie. I can’t wait for your book to come out. I wonder what the hell is taking Carrie Rubin so damn long though…..
I know, right? I guess she just doesn’t have her act together. Those Carries never do.
Did you check your birth certificate? Maybe they know something you don’t . . .
Oh, wow, good point. Maybe I’ve been trapped in the wrong name my whole life. Hmmm. Connie. Connie. Yeah, I guess I could get used to that…
I’m looking forward to those upcoming posts (definitely give a poo) – and to the book, even more. The website glitch is really depressing. They had better apologize. (If I had done that to someone, I’d feel terrible.)
Thanks, Carol, for giving a poo. That makes me happy.
And yes, I hope my name gets corrected soon, especially once the book actually comes out!
I should have said Carey. That’s funnier.
You’re right. That is. And more androgynous, too, which probably wouldn’t have been a bad thing…
I don’t care what your publisher says….you’ll always be Carrie to me.
Aww, thanks.
Oh my goodness, my heart flipped for you. See? The need for savvy copyeditors is still alive and well and breathing, even on publishers’ websites. I hope it’s not too late to fix it, or at the very least, doesn’t mean that now you have to change your name from Carrie to Connie just so you can get credit for the book
I am one of those people who gives a poo about your book and the process behind it. I’m sure your posts will be very informative and delightful
Thank you! That is so nice to hear.
I hope they’ll get Carrie back to where she belongs on that new releases page, but at least the name is correct on my book cover. At least for now, anyway…
More bad news Connie, it turns out they mispelled Gary Towner’s name too. The proper spelling is “John Grisham”. No competition there!
No, none whatsoever.
I’ll call you “Con” for short, cause we’re close like that.
Sounds good. And I’ll call you “One.”
Easy there girl….let’s slow it down a notch ok?…jeez
Give me an inch…
no comment whatosever…well except for those three words…and these
Although I was referring to the “give ‘em an inch, they’ll take a mile” saying, I realize how bad leaving it at “Give me an inch…” must have looked. Must choose my expressions more carefully next time. I blame it on Connie.
She’s a naughty one, that Connie!
It figures.
I’m going to get back to writing junk before this takes any scary turns…
Good idea. Me, too.
Ouch on Connie. Looking forward to the next 3 blog posts! Very curious about your book after getting to know you so well on your blog.
Well, it’s not going to find its way to Oprah, but Connie had fun writing it.
LOL. That’s what matters most! You had fun writing it and you are getting it published–double win.
Many writers write under a pen name . . . maybe you should embrace the “Connie” in you.
Look forward to your installments. We will all learn from your process.
Thanks, Robin. Hopefully someone can learn something from my posts, other than how difficult it can be to spell the name “Carrie.” Those Rs can be tricky, you know. Just think, you could be “Nobin Coyle.”
Or . . . Nobody Coyle.
I think you have many satisfied followers who would beg to differ with that.
Oh my God, that is priceless and just the type of thing that would happen to me. I’m looking forward to your upcoming posts on the publishing process. I’ll think of it as research. Only easier. And more interesting.
Btw, I loved you in The Greatest American Hero.
Ha ha!! Connie Sellecca is the only Connie that came to my mind when I saw that name after my book title, so it’s funny you mentioned her TV show. And thanks for your interest and for stopping by. I appreciate it!
And congrats on being Freshly Pressed, by the way. It was a great post. I should have left a comment. I remember that ad with the Native American guy in it. It was one of the greats, although I enjoyed your humorous take on it.
Thank you. And congrats on being published. Not that I’m ungrateful at all, but getting published sort of b!tch slaps getting freshly pressed any day. I toast to your success with the beer I’m looking forward to having later. I’m looking forward to reading about the journey.
Thank you, and enjoy your beer! And your well-earned Freshly Pressed status. Nothing to snuff at, for sure.
First of all, Connie, congrats on the September release! I’ll pick up Le Scourge d’Seneca as soon as it comes out.
I (and I imagine a lot of other people also) am pretty interested to hear about the process (which I know you’ll talk about a little more in two of the three posts), particularly the process which begins when your manuscript is finished (before the editor’s revisions).
Knock ‘em dead, Connie!
Thanks! Connie actually stepped out for lunch–I hear she’s been hounded by paparazzi lately; something about stealing other people’s books–but I’ll let her know. I just hope she’s not sleeping with my publisher. Then I’ll know I’m doomed…
I just hope she’s not sleeping with my publisher
I’ve got some bad news for you…
I knew it!!
Hey, just cause Tom Arnold rose to fame by stupping Rosanne, doesn’t mean he wasn’t funny in the first place.
He’s funny? Really?
Looks like someone’s publisher needs a bitch-slap. Can I do it?? Please???
I’m sad that you didn’t bring chocolate for us, but I’m looking forward to reading these 3 upcoming posts anyway.
Oh, good. It will be BYOC (bring your own chocolate) for those posts. Or bring your own club, you know, to billy club whoever out there thinks my name is Connie. And I would let you do it, but, well, I still need someone left over there to get my book out. And something tells me you would be too efficient in your slapping, leaving no one left in your path…
An image of young hard bodies in tighty whities! I guess that was Connie’s idea huh?
You cheeky monkey, better to laugh and snort Mt. Dew than get your panties in a twist, IMHO. I’m looking forward to reading about the process. -Nikki
Thanks, Nikki! (And thanks for reading the other comments, too.) And you’re right. One has to laugh in these situations. Because, really, in the grand scheme of things, this is pretty minor.
For as long as I can remember people have had questions about the proper spelling of my name. I usually reply, “It doesn’t matter to me. I’ll answer to anything. Puddin’ tame if that suits your fancy.” Although, a Google search for your book would be a lot more effective with the proper author name attached to it! =)
Yes, that Google thing could be a limiting factor…
“Connie”? Aw, come on, guys. That’s just sad. I mean seriously, does she look like a “Connie” to you?
But look on the bright side: they could’ve gotten your name right but called your book “The Seance Grouse”…
Looking forward to it no matter what it’s named (or what you’re named).
You know how you read comments from people where they say they laughed so hard at something you wrote that they sprayed the drink they were sipping all over the computer? Well, I always thought that was an exaggeration. Until I just read your comment, that is. I was taking a drink of my Diet Mountain Dew (yes, I know it can dissolve rats, but let’s not go there), and I read the part where you said they could have called my book “The Seance Grouse,” and I kid you not, Diet Dew went up my nose when I laughed. So thanks for that. It’s probably burning through my septum by now.
But thank you for your interest and for making me laugh this morning, both here and on Twitter. For me, there really is nothing better.
Sorry about your septum. But I enjoyed the laughs, and I’m glad you did, too (once the pain subsided).
I can’t wait for September! And those rat bastids better have it all straight by then dagnabit!
If not, I know who to send after them. And she’ll be bringing cake with her!
Oh you’ve been writing under a not brilliantly disguised pseudonym. Presumably you have contacted them and changed your mind about that, and “politely” asked that they change it to your real name?
Anyhoo, I shall look forward to the next three posts, not that I don’t the normal ones, but you know what I mean.
Thank you. And yes, I did send off an email alerting them of the poorly disguised pseudonym, though I have not yet heard back. If Carrie doesn’t reappear soon, I’ll contact my editor. He’s been good about email responding. Let’s just hope Connie doesn’t get my paltry royalty checks…
Well done you. David
Connie says thank you. And so does Carrie.
Can’t wait to read it!
Thanks. I can’t either. I’m looking forward to seeing what Connie’s come up with.
I hear she’s good!
Let’s hope you heard right.
And when you’re a famous, sought-after author, this will be the story you’ll tell on the late-night talk shows. Congrats, Carrie, and best of luck!
Wow, talk about a glass half-full! Love your positivity, even if it is a bit delusional about my novel-writing abilitities.
Thanks!
I don’t see what the problem is, the cure is simple..change your name. DUH!
Oh, man, why didn’t I think of that?! See? All that early morning outdoors work is keeping you sharp.
Can’t wait until your book release!
Pink.
Thank you! I’ll let Connie know…
Your evil twin has done it again!
I think you’re right. That vixen is hard to track down. Last I heard, she was doing a Skype striptease to Tom Jones music with someone called La La…
I have no idea what you’re speaking of…..
The sweet and innocent never do…
Good luck Connie…ah… I mean Carrie! ( It takes so little to confuse me.)
Best of luck with the book!
Thank you from both me AND Connie!
You are both welcome!
Welp, that’s what happens when you submit your final manuscript in Gothic Letterplate (and italicized at that!)
As long as the cover has the right name, you should be fine.
Both my HS and undergrad yearbooks have my name spelled incorrectly.
Yes, guess I better start using better font.
I’m used to Carrie being spelled wrong, but I’ve never been a Connie before. Who knows? Maybe Connie will have better luck with the marketing…
Thanks for stopping by!
Meanwhile, poor Connie Rubin of Peoria is wondering why her Knitting And Bondage blog has suddenly had such an uptick in hits.
Congratulations, and looking forward to all your posts about the process!
Well, I’m more than happy to help Connie out. Knitting and bondage seems like a potentially scary combination though. Ouch.
Thanks for the nice words and for stopping by.
Thanks for making me almost snort coffee up my nose, Guap.
Yeah, that was a good one by Guap, wasn’t it?
Well, that typo would deflate anyone’s ego! It looks as if someone transcribed it from unclear handwriting…. Yikes, you have contacted them about it, right?!
I for one am looking forward to reading the promised posts. And I’d bet more than 90 percent of your readers are with me on that.
Thank you. All joking aside, that’s very nice to hear. As for the mistake, I did contact them but haven’t heard back yet. If it’s not changed in the next couple days, I’ll contact my editor who is a great responder of emails and can hopefully straighten it out. It’s not that it’s a big deal to have it wrong on the release page, but I just want to make sure they have the right name for me on record!
Well done, Connie, we’re all very proud of you! Now, can we have Carrie back and hear what SHE thinks? Must be really exciting times for you, looking forward to hearing more about this big release!
Ha ha!! Thanks for a good laugh. What else is there to do in these situations? At least that’s what Carrie thinks. As for Connie, if the book sucks, it’s all on her.
Oh man, I should feel bad about the name mixup, but I’m too busy laughing. I do hope it’s printed right on the book, though. Congrats
Oh, believe me, after my initial shock and disappointment, I laughed, too. How can one not? My husband didn’t even share the shock and disappointment. He just went straight to the laughter. But yes, at least my name is correct on the cover art. At least for now…
Oh My Goodness! – Just the thing that would happen to me and remember I’m self-publishing!! lol Seriously, they need to get that fixed! You deserve to be recognized for all your hard work properly!!
Thanks. My husband laughed when he saw it and said, “This could only happen to you.” So I’m glad to hear things like this happen to others, too.
Hopefully they got your name right on the book itself…
I’m looking forward to hearing about your journey to become a published author!
Thanks! And yes, my name is correct on the cover art. For now, anyway. Let’s just hope they get it right on my paltry royalty checks.
Carrie — CONGRATS!!! I look forward to these other posts. How proud you must be. You did it. As far as the name thing, oh boy that would get to me too. It’s going to fixed right??
Seriously, though it’s gotta be a wonderful feeling and I can’t wait to hear about the rest — share, tell and show. I don’t know why writers doubt, but I understand what you mean and love the Animal House pic — perfect. Way to go, Carrie. Own it woman, you’ve accomplished what many only dream about.
Thanks, Brigitte. Nice of you to say. But it’s hard not to have the self-doubt. Maybe if I could have landed a big-boy New York publisher, I’d feel more confident. Then again, probably not.
Thanks, as always, for stopping by.
There’s plenty of worthy publishers, Carrie. Not all are in NYC, despite what everyone thinks. I’m so happy for you. Can’t wait to hear more!!
Thank you.
