Birth Of A Social Networking Loner

It was not long ago I protested the use of social networking sites, nose a little skyward, with quips like:

“You’ll never catch me on Twitter.”

“I dare you to Google me. You won’t find anything but job-related links.”

“I only wish my life was so dull that I could spend hours of it twiddling online.”

Well, I may not be twiddling, but I’m certainly twittering. And Goodreading. And WordPressing. And commenting and liking and Linking on In.

Writers know marketing is part of the publishing process. They also know it should start early, well before a book summons its first paying reader. But here’s the snag. Many writers are introverts. That is probably why we like to write. We are alone. With our thoughts. Thoughts easier to reveal by keyboard than mouth.

If you are not sure whether or not you are an introvert (really?), I found a checklist to guide you. Might be the highest test score I’ve ever received.

Okay, no need for nail biting; I made peace with my introversion long ago. Or my “Sheldonism” as my family calls it, for any Big Bang Theory fans out there. In fact, I rather enjoy the following quote: “The limited circle is pure.”—Franz Kafka.

Kind of ironic I found it on a social networking site.

So how does a reticent networker network? Surprisingly easily. In fact, maybe these sites were developed with the introvert in mind. Express yourself in 140 characters or less? No problem. Join a discussion without the usual pressure of verbal tongue-tie? Groovy. Comment on blog posts you find insightful and interesting, all from the comfort of your timid cocoon? (Or Snuggie if you’re one of those. I am not.) Hey, count me in.

And guess what? It has been much easier to assimilate than I ever imagined. In fact, most challenging is:

  1. Deluding myself I hold anything of interest to others.
  2. Budgeting my time accordingly. I am trying to write another novel, after all.

The latter is proving most difficult. I encounter so many interesting people, whether by perusing blogs or eyeballing tweets or comparing book lists. People from different countries, different life situations, different viewpoints. And how cool is it to tweet an author whose book you’ve just read? Seems much more than mere marketing (especially considering I am presently a product-less promoter). In fact, it is more like an awakening.

Now, if only I could learn to put it down for a nap…

Photo credit: all images from Microsoft Clip Art

433 Responses to “Birth Of A Social Networking Loner”

  1. robincoyle

    This post is soooooooooo you. I love your writer’s timing in the pacing of how you write. Your writing is different now, but the same. Know what I mean? A VERY belated congratulations on being Freshly Pressed almost a year ago. Your birthday card from me for the year 2010 should be reaching you shortly.


    • Carrie Rubin

      Haha–Thanks Robin. Nice of you to give it a read. It was one of my more serious entries so I suppose the tone is a bit different. Thanks for the kind words.


  2. Main Street Musings Blog

    This really strikes a chord with me, and apparently many others, based on the feedback! I have an introversive side which I am constantly at odds with–sometimes I accept it, sometimes I push myself to socialize more. The “anonymity” of social media is a helpful crutch, but when there’s a writing conference to attend I’m on my own!


    • crubin

      It is a bit of a crutch, isn’t it? In fact, I get so comfortable behind the screen that I feel I need to shift gears when I’m out in public and have to maintain face-to-face interaction. I have to be careful, or I may start to prefer the former! (OK, I probably already do…)

      Thanks so much for commenting!


  3. klent

    A beautiful writing piece. And so true to that, we all feel a bit intimidated by the idea of marketing ourselves first. I mean thats why we took time out to stay away from the crowd an observe whats going on rather than being part of the chaoe. But the irony! Would love to read more from you.
    Take care


    • crubin

      Thank you so much for stopping by to comment. I suppose marketing is never easy. But at least hiding behind a computer makes it more palatable.


  4. Pink Ninjabi

    Your Sheldonism is most charmin’. Yup. You speak for many of us when you mention the dual dilemma of marketing ourselves when our introverted selves clutch to our Snuggie and scream, “but nooo! It’s a big scary world out there!”

    Yes it is.

    But your blog reminds us of ‘safe’ avenues to express ourselves, seek connection, and find comfort when we are too shy to ask. Or maybe that’s just me.

    Either way. Thank you so much for sharing. 😀



    • crubin

      Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting! It’s always good to learn there are others out there like me. I like the name of your blog. Looking forward to checking it out.


      • Pink Ninjabi


        You’re most kind! I’m a bit of a unique blend of everything, but hopefully I won’t scare you off or others in my blog writing…

        I think the great thing about reading other’s blogs is to realize we are not alone. Because, well, it is such a cold world at times. WordPress blogs like yours reminds me that there are others out there, just like me, getting through one moment at a time.. 😀

        Thank you so much for posting, and I look forward to reading more! 😀 You have awesome sincere smile! That alone should draw more fandom 😀



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