Stereotypes bug me. If I have to listen to one more joke about women and shopping, my frozen smile might shatter into shards.
No one likes to be pigeon-holed. We are who we are. But there is some truth to stereotypes. That’s how the labels came about in the first place.
So now I’m wondering,
Am I really a man?…
Reasons I Might Be a Man:
- I don’t like to shop. Let me repeat, I don’t like to shop.
- Action movies are my preference.
- I am the technology person in my home. Which is scary.
- I possess the remote control in my home. Which is Sheldon-y.
- I don’t like to talk about my emotions.
- Driving long distance entertains me.
- I prefer beer to wine.
- I kill bugs.
- Diamonds are not my best friend.
- I read thrillers.
- I don’t read romance, especially if Nicholas Sparks is involved.
- I don’t go to the bathroom in groups.
- Wearing the same clothes two days in a row suits me fine.
- I avoid pink and glitter, and I never ♥ anything.
- Horses have no emotional pull over me. None. Nada. Neigh.
- I don’t love footwear. Ugly man shoes, boots, and Jesus sandals rotate seasonally.
Reasons I Might Be a Woman:
- The last time I looked, I had lady parts.
- I have low testosterone.
- Even though I’ll kill bugs, I make Mr. Rubin do it if he’s there.
- A snake sighting would do me in.
- Skydiving, race-car driving, and bungee jumping hold no appeal.
- I am a wuss. (See #4 and #5.)
- Mr. Rubin bought me a nice handbag once. Now I rather enjoy them.
- I wear makeup and don’t feel complete without it.
- I gave birth. Twice.
- I love chocolate. Let me repeat, I love chocolate.
- I don’t wrestle.
- Bodily functions—auditory or otherwise—don’t amuse me.
- I want to comfort anything that’s hurting.
- Football is as important to me as fuzz in my pockets.
- I’ve never mowed a lawn. (Don’t make fun. I have cleaned urinals in a fast-food restaurant.)
- I like The View and Dr. Phil.
- I smell good. I think.
Phew, it looks like the double-X list is longer. I might be a woman after all…
Any stereotypes you break? Any movie or book clichés you hate? If you’re a writer, any stereotype traps you fall into?